| Please excuse Ray Friday from school. He has very loose vowels. |
| Please excuse Tommy for being absent yesterday. He had diarrhea and his boots leak. |
| Irving was absent yesterday because he missed his bust. |
| Please excuse Jimmy for being. It was his father's fault. |
| I kept Billie home because she had to go Christmas shopping because I don't know what size she wear. |
| Please excuse Jennifer for missing school yesterday. We forgot to get the Sunday paper off the porch, and when we found it Monday, we thought it was Sunday. |
| Sally won't be in school a week from Friday. We have to attend her funeral. |
| My daughter was absent yesterday because she was tired. She spent a weekend with the Marines. |
| Please excuse Jason for being absent yesterday. He had a cold and could not breed well. |
| Please excuse Mary for being absent yesterday. She was in bed with gramps. |
| Gloria was absent yesterday as she was having a gangover. |
| Please excuse Burma, she has been sick and under the doctor. |
| Please excuse Bob from school from Sep. 1 - Nov. 1, he had to attend a religious sacrificial giving ceremony on Indian grounds. |
| Please excuse my son from school yesterday, he has gangrene and cock itch. |
| I'm sorry but my baby sitter flushed my homework down the toilet. |
| I'm sorry Tyler can't go to school today because his hormones are raging. |
| I'm sorry I can't come to school today because I have toemonia! |
| Oh, sorry [teachers name], the cafeteria food made me delirious. |
| Al was not in school yesterday because he was didn't feel like going. |
| I was late for class because the bell rang before I got here!! |
| I won't be in class because my dog chipped my tooth. |
| I was absent because I got my head caught in the power window of the car. |
| My dog has mistaken my homework for that GOSH DAMN newspaper. |
| My sister ate it... (I don't really recommend you to use it.) |
| I got mugged on the way to school and they took my Bag with the homework in it. |
| My baby brother threw up on my home work. |
| I got stuck in the elevator. |
| My mom forgot to wake me up. |
| Didn't You feel The Earthquake? |
